Really, this virtual nonsense has to stop

I'm a hypocrite. I'm a hypocrite because I blog. Because I'm on facebook. And have dormant profiles on friendster and myspace and linkedin. And yet, hypocrite or not, I am here to say that this virtual crap has to end.

Facebook, which I joined because speaking to someone in person is considered taboo on campus, has a new "socially conscious" campaign where you- yes, you- and I could become "virtual parents" to any one (or two or three) of thirteen million orphans out there. And by virtual parents, I mean give money to them.

This initiative, spear-headed by our very own Fearless Leader, the man who puts the G in G.W., a/k/a he-who-must-not-be-named, wishes to "save 13 million orphans lives and get 25 million HIV/AIDS sufferers treated to reverse the pandemic." Noble of course and this is where you can be a virtual parent. I am sure the the internet-savvy youngsters of rural Chad will be heartened to know that 4,000 miles away, in the comfort of your own home, you too care about them.

Of course this is just an update of those old Sally Struthers come ons- you know the ones where she speaks over photos of African babies without actually spending time around said babies- and how you too can "monitor the progress" of your "virtual orphan."

Now, on the one hand I'm totally in favor of helping orphans, African or otherwise. On the other hand, this is just another way to pretend to "care". You send out ten bucks and tell everyone how you're a virtual parent. Oh well. I suppose that after virtual sex, virtual kids are the next step.